“I’m scared!”
Many students, especially high school girls, come to me with this phrase before a test or an exam. I acknowledge how they feel then I ask them to rephrase it: “I’m nervous.”
Because saying “I’m scared” can sometimes make the feeling seem overwhelming, as though everything is out of your control, you don’t know where to start, and there’s nothing you can do about it.
Saying “I’m nervous” helps normalise the feelings we have before a test or an exam. And more importantly, it reminds us that there are things we can do to manage those feelings.
Break down the fear into small, manageable steps
The first thing I normally ask is:
“What are you nervous about?”
“What exactly are you afraid of?”
Then we start breaking things down, step by step, working backwards from the exam date.
- When is your test or exam?
- How many days do you have left?
- What topics do you need to focus on?
- What can we realistically achieve each day?
Let’s write everything down on paper or in a calendar. Then, each day, we can tick off the tasks we’ve completed.
By talking things through and having a visual plan with small, manageable steps, students often feel less overwhelmed and more in control.
Sometimes, simply knowing where to start and actually sitting down and doing any small task is all we need to feel less overwhelmed. Because stress doesn’t always come from there’s too much to do but many times you’re stressed because you’re not doing what you’re supposed to do.
All the best to your exam preparations and good luck to your upcoming exams!